Too Big To Win


I’m CEO of O’Fory Farms, the massive produce development behemoth that was putting the last small farmers out of business.

O’Fory Farms is backed by even bigger corporate entities with political goals. A group of us decide it’s time to override the nation-state.

Why should corporations bow to governments that are generally corrupt and poorly managed? Our resources surmount those of most nations. It’s time to prepare for corporate freedom.

I’m in line for my own military security force if I can just make a great impression before the next corporate Defense Formation Committee meeting. They’ll soon be deciding on whom to award the contract to for feeding millions.

I know that our agreed-upon task is achieving the initial goal of destabilizing and disarming any powerful nation-states by encouraging the division of territories into ever-smaller regulatory zones.

I pressure my research team for something “worth your pay” and they produce the first cell magnifier, an amazing combination of genetics, physics and technology that astonishingly increases the size of most produce by a factor of eight overnight, even when the produce has already ripened and been picked!

We keep some side-effects quiet for as long as possible. But when we have ominous incidents such as the fly that appears on the lab floor one morning, flopping helplessly because it’s the size of a Chihuahua, leaks get out and things are revealed.

Before tests on the food are completed, I privately ingest a good portion of a giant peach, and it is the greatest peach I have ever tasted!

I order more samples of the giant fruits and nuts, which my aides go forth and gather obediently.

Sadly, ten hours later I pay the nightmarish price.

I awaken unable at first to sit up, then struggling to rise but unable to stand, tasking a brain confused and overtaxed by the demands of a much larger form than the one it fell asleep in.

I lie upon crushed furniture with my arms and legs through the walls and a rooftop protecting my modesty, having collapsed on my genitals.

I flail, awkwardly yanking my arms and legs back in and as close to my body as possible.

My tough but still-human skin suffers complete exposure. I attract unusual hordes of insects that behave aggressively toward me.

Then there are the people…

Hysterical little squealers scurry behind me everywhere I go unless they’re assaulting me instead. Taking pictures, throwing bottles, screaming at me! What are they looking at? So what, I’m big! I’m…

My transformed body feels alien and hunger gnaws wildly. I have to get away from these little people before I…!

Covering my trail is impossible. Where do I sleep, or even get to rest, under relentless pursuit? I can only crawl, roll or drag my bulk to safety but it’s never any use. To have peace –if even for a moment –it’s always the same. I start killing them.

Then they run, all of them, for just a while in the other direction.

Still, a fugitive giant’s dilemma. Once alone, what is there to eat? Where will there be enough food to satisfy day after day? I’ve discovered by gross accident that the only edible thing that fills me is the same thing persecuting me!

How can I make this work before they find a way to destroy me? Can a hampered giant survive?

 Maybe… if the world suddenly gets on my side.

Everything in nature seems to grow larger overnight.

Water spouts in gushing fountains of various heights as underground pipes are burst by flexing root systems.

Sparks fly and lights go out when stretching limbs tear power lines off their poles.

Ivy invades the interiors of apartment buildings and offices even as it completely engulfs thousands of buildings on the outside.

Apples, oranges and other enlarged fruits plunge unexpectedly from tremendous heights killing hundreds.

Gargantuan tangles of machete-sized thorns trap hundreds of thousands while the overwhelming fragrance of giant roses sickens them.

Eating is no problem. In short order the entire population of Earth, animal and insect alike, has more than enough to eat. But there is too much food and nothing to do with it. In a few days the surplus is rotting and the smell of Earth’s atmosphere is becoming a challenge.

Homes sink into oblivion. Oceans become impassable with thousand foot stalks protruding from the surface and tangles of seaweed gumming up waterways.Highways are wrapped in mighty vines.

And I’m still the only giant human. Was it the combination of fruits that I consumed at the wrong time that left me a pitiful, fevered thing that can barely lift my arms to drag my overheating dead weight a few miserable yards? The biggest man on Earth is the slowest man on Earth, with an appetite that cannot be fulfilled. But who needs to go anywhere when chaos sends the whole wide world right to you?

At least I’ll never run out of food.